Flaming Masculinity recommends single malt scotch on the rocks with a twist of shame
Flaming from the heart, pants optional
Posted in Uncategorized with tags love on December 25, 2011 by dotnood
Wishing you and yours a Flaming Canadian Christmas!!!!
Posted in Uncategorized with tags christmas freedom flaming masculinity canada on December 25, 2011 by dotnood
Gettin’ Funky-Fresh, Hebrew Style, In Berlin…
Posted in Uncategorized with tags hanukkah christmas germany liberty flaming masculinity justice glory hadag nachash azz on December 14, 2011 by dotnood
Flaming Masculinity taking in a show by his favorite Israeli hip-hop band
When it comes to music, Flaming Mascilinity likes what he likes. And when he was in Berlin and saw that HaDag Nachash, his favorite Israeli hip hop/soul act was in town, he had to check them out. Just before showtime, he headed over to the venue to hang out with the band and kick a verse or two with them. Of course, the band was dazzled by his ability to kick a sick Hebrew freestyle and insisted that he join them on stage. The warm up band finished their set and the crowd was ready for a killer show from the headliners. After playing a crowd pleasing set of some of their biggest hits, they announced that they had a special guest and out came Flaming Masculinity to a barrage of pyrotechnics. Flames started shooting out of the sides of the stage and the crowd started chanting “PORNO! PORNO!” over and over again until it worked itself into a hot sweaty frenzy. Babies started popping out of many of the women in the crowd. Rainbows started shooting out of the eyes of everyone and a romance explosion the likes of which the European continent has never seen before or since blew the roof off of the East Berlin concert hall, releasing a sexy, steaming rainbow coloured cloud of liberty that soon engulfed the skies of Central Europe. Liberty rained from the skies for 45.71 days and flooded the region in true glory. German Chancellor Angela Merkel declared a national state of Sexiness and the people danced in the street for weeks. When asked to comment on the situation, Flaming Masculinity was reported to say, “Its gonna be a good Hanukkah this year.”
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Flamingly Political
Posted in Uncategorized with tags evian water occupy wall street dazzle nude friendship rights corporation liberty flaming on December 9, 2011 by dotnood
Free Water And Porno For All!!!!
Was he drawn to the message about public water rights or was it the blue thumb tack that seems to be lovingly placed where her left nipple should be? We may never know friends…
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More Dinges Please!
Posted in Uncategorized with tags waffle dinges belgium flaming boner pregnancy on December 9, 2011 by dotnood
Its a well established fact that Flaming Masculinity is a lover of all things Belgian, especially ladies and waffles. And you are hard pressed to find a better waffle in New York City then those of the good people from the “Waffles and Dinges” waffle truck. After working a long, hard day of professional dazzling, Flaming Masculinity decided to head down to the the East Village, on public transit of course, to pick up some items for the Sexy Santa costume that he was preparing for SantaCon 2011. As he strolled sexily down St. Marks Place, he stumbled upon the elusive truck and felt compelled the order some sumptuous goodness for himself. He ordered “de Throwdown Waffle”, which was slathered in a thick helping of whip cream and spekuloos. The woman taking the order asked, “Will that be all?”, to which he replied, “Extra dinges please”. The woman ferociously piled on strawberries, fudge, maple syrup and butter and handed the pile of Belgian goodness to Flaming Masculinity. He took his first byte and said “Holy crap! This waffle is as good as my favorite porno, which stars me and six fine Swedish ladies, or at least they said they were ladies, only two of the six got pregnant, so you never know”. To this the fine waffle lady said, “I can’t take it anymore I am so aroused by you. You have already given me six boners and two pregnancies since you approached the waffle truck!”. Read more »
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It’s going to be a long night
Posted in Uncategorized with tags coldblooded, diner, edward hopper, fifties, flaming, freedom, hard, masculinity, nighthawks, porno, retro, romance, tom waits, waitress, winter on December 7, 2011 by flamingmasculinity
Flaming Masculinity entered his local diner late one foggy night. All around him the nighthawks were sobering up, nursing their lukewarm grandes and picking at stale day-old bearclaws like winter crows around a stone-cold roadkill.
Sitting himself at the counter, he looked towards the waitress. She glanced up from her paper, looking him over, hard. She stared down her nose through a pair of chained neon red horn-rims. Cold blooded.
Clearly, this would be his biggest challenge yet.
“It’s going to be a long night,” he growled like a tiger.
20 minutes later, and after the waitress had danced with him on the counter, and the patrons had reveled in his pure dazzling freedom glinting off the chrome retro decor, Flaming Masculinity settled back onto his stool.
“It’s going to be a long night,” he said quietly with a grin.
